Acquire relics of the poulinke realm. All items are either out of stock, unclear, or disputed.
Every item here has been carefully sourced from the coop. Every item is out of stock. This is not a supply chain issue. The poulinkes simply do not wish to part with these things. We list them anyway, because the longing is part of the experience.
Hand-captured from the interior of a certified poulinke residence. Notes of hay, ambition, and the faint scent of someone who has figured something out but isn't telling you.
$44.00 / breath Add to CartA genuine egg, signed by Sir Clucksworth the Eternal. The signature is not visible to humans. Poulinkes can see it. They have confirmed it exists. We have not confirmed the poulinkes confirmed this.
$333.00 Add to CartMay or may not be from a poulinke. Feather is of bird origin. That is all we can confirm. Comes with a certificate of authenticity that is also of uncertain origin.
$189.00 Add to CartA recording of Sir Clucksworth clucking once, in 1987, in the presence of three world leaders. What was communicated has never been translated. The file is 14 seconds long. It feels longer.
$12.00 Add to CartA single page from the sacred text, written in original Cluckish. Comes with a partial translation. The translation is missing the most important sentence. The missing sentence is different for every reader.
$670.00 Add to Cart"Midnight Roost" scent. Notes of cedar, wheat, and existential certainty. Burns for approximately 40 hours, during which you will feel watched. You are watched. This is not the candle.
$55.00 Add to CartAn artist's impression of what Brooder the Unseen looks like, painted by someone who has never seen Brooder but felt they were being watched by an egg once and translated the experience.
$1,200.00 Add to CartApply to temples during important decisions. Formulated from egg yolk and "additional sacred ingredients." The additional sacred ingredients are more egg yolk. Wisdom sold separately. Wisdom is not available.
$89.00 / 30ml Add to CartA timepiece with no numbers, no hands, and no mechanism. Time is a human construct. The poulinke simply knows. This watch helps you practice not knowing. It is extremely expensive.
$4,000.00 Add to CartContains one item from the coop. Item is not specified. Item may be physical, conceptual, or a feeling. Some recipients received just a single feather. One recipient received an answer to a question they hadn't asked yet. Returns not accepted.
$99.00 Add to CartA decorative egg for those who feel they need one present during important meetings, moments of doubt, or late-night existential reckonings. The egg does not hatch. It simply is. This is enough.
$25.00 Add to CartAn official letter, on heavy cream paper, confirming that you are a poulinke. The letter does not specify when, how, or in what capacity. It simply confirms. The confirmation is not new information. It is a reminder.
$Free (out of stock) Add to CartItems will be restocked when the poulinkes decide. The poulinkes have not decided. You can join the waitlist. The waitlist is currently 33 billion names long. Most of the names are poulinkes. We did not ask them how they got on it.
Join the Flock (Waitlist Access Included)